3 Steps for when something has got to give

Apr 1, 2026

It’s happened to all of us... 

We have this nagging feeling that something has got to change in our lives,

We think that work might be the culprit.

First, we ignore it...

then we tolerate it...

then we compromise with ourselves...

and then, eventually, we decide that something‘s got to change. 

 

 

Great! But now what???

The moment you decide something has got to change can be super scary.

 

Your brain immediately goes to all the things you can't do. 

As someone in the medical profession said to me once, "I can't afford to ditch it all and move to Bermuda so I can't stop doing what I'm doing". 

 

So what's a person to do?

 

After years of working to help people avoid burning out, and decades of helping people thrive at work, here’s my prescription for the first three things to do when you decide that something has to change about work.

 

NUMBER ONE: give your nervous system a break.

All the ignoring, tolerating, compromising and complaining that you’ve been doing has put your nervous system on high alert. 

Maybe you’re not sleeping.

Maybe you’re gaining or losing weight. 

Maybe that kink in your neck will just never go away. 

Your body feels it has to protect itself.

 

Giving their nervous systems a break is the the first thing I help my clients with in my Wayfinder package. 

They know something needs to change but they don't know what or how. 

They are often asking, "Do I adapt myself, try to change my situation, or do I look for something else?"

But none of us can see our options clearly until we give our nervous systems a break so that you can start to think more clearly. 

 

Here's some ways:

  1. Try a grounding technique such as these: https://www.therapistaid.com/therapy-article/grounding-techniques-article
  2. Practice regular breathing technique such as box breathing
  3. Move! It doesn't take much movement to interrupt your stress cycle. Try walking quickly in one direction for 5 minutes and then turning around.

 

NUMBER TWO is to manage your emotions around what you are experiencing.

We can be tricked into thinking that emotions have nothing to do with work.

Not so!

Our emotions are an important part of what we experience, even at work!

They give us information and help us make decisions. 

Check out some great advice on how to how managing your emotions can help you. 

 

NUMBER THREE is to find social supports. 

Whether it is joining a group, hiring a coach, engaging a therapist, or confiding in a trusted friend, it's critical to have help in these murky times.

But be careful that your social supports aren’t just an opportunity for commiserating.

It feels good to complain together, but what you’re looking for in moments like these are social supports that can help you:

  • see your options more clearly, 
  • take action, and 
  • sit in the discomfort of change

 

 

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